As everyone lined up this morning on the 399th KWP Parkrun start line it couldn't be ignored that on this eve of the eve of All Hallows Eve the week's news has been focused on the latest blood sucking vampire to ingratiate himself at No10.
Sunak's American influence cannot be ignored and it's perhaps prophetic as this island nation embraces the American tradition of dressing up as the Devil with a view of wandering the streets taking food and money from people.
It was quite a scary sight to see Devils, fallen angels, pumpkins, dog pumpkins, ghosts, ghouls, zombies, monsters and other assorted scary folk on the course. Some had even dressed up.
Almost as frightening was the pace with which Ryan Preece smashed the win, Alexander Haywood fastest youth and Meg Griffiths fastest woman. Scarier still the determination with which Michael Ball and Sharon Whitehead got the job done.
A ditty popped into my head as I did my best to encourage 215 of you around the course. I might speak to a record producer as I think it could be a hit.
"Nine in the morning
Something evil's lurking in the park
Out of the lake mist
You see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream
On realising that you have to run two laps
You start to freeze
As Benham looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed
'Cause this is Kingsbur-ry Parkrun
And no one's gonna save you
From the mud throughout the run
You know it's Kingsbur-ry Parkrun
You're overtaking runners left right and centre, faster, ow
You're gonna run through the wood
Puddles formed along the route
The Big Thumbs sign is close at hand
Your thighs scream for you to stop
Get it done even if you hop (you're gonna feel it tonight)
And whosoever shall be found
Lacking the strength to get around
Must stand and face the tail walkers
Inspiring and expert talkers
They'll get you to the finish
The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of 430 pairs
As reps of twenty four different clubs
Are closing in on new PB's (oh, yeah)
As you fight towards the line
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can resist
The finishing sprint thriller
'Cause this is Kinsbur-ry Parkrun
You're gonna get muddy and there's no point in dodging puddles
Kingsbur-ry Parkrun
You're fighting to the line and it's a killer, thriller"
In all 215 of you completed the course today, 34 of you were newbies, 27 volunteers made it possible, 11 personal bests displayed in finisher texts and 24 clubs represented. I'm not one for conspiracies but if you add the number of clubs to the number of PB's and multiply the total by number of volunteers and then deduct the number of runners and the number of newbies and the cost of a round of coffees in the cafe afterwards and then add the number of unknowns finishing today it totals 666! Happy eve of eve of All Hallows Eve. Sleep well.
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